To be real, you must never lie to yourself and others. To be real is not trying to be cool, or to reach a standard.
To be real, you must be comfortable in your skin, with your flaws, your mistakes, your past, your present, and you must not hide or run away from any of it.
It’s never easy to be real because we all have secrets to hide and we all have insecurities that we are not comfortable with.
As long as we find that what we commit to what society expects, we’re safe to reveal. But if it’s a “dirty”, “low-standard”, “rebellious” thought or action, we’re like rats avoiding court judgments.
As long as we find that we commit to what the other person expects, we’re comfortable with being ourselves. But if it’s something the other would not expect from you, it’s the last thing you want to talk about.
Honesty is not an act, but a great virtue that requires suffering and enormous amount of self-discipline to attain.
If you’re not comfortable with suffering the judgment of others and the possibility of losing something or someone that can only be kept with lies, you will never be able to be honest with yourself, your life, and others.
Your values can only be as much as how real you are and how high the quality of your inner-self is. With time, through suffering and self-discipline, you will break through all the lies, become more real, and learn to raise your value in life.
You can’t rush or overestimate your value and realness. You may trick and cheat certain people, but those things and people that matter to you, they will slowly learn everything about you.
So start from today. Learn to be comfortable with who you are, be real, be truthful, be honest, and let life teaches you how to become a diamond from a piece of coal. Prepare to suffer, and learn the art of self-discipline.